20 Jul 2006

I might as well face the fact that for all the fancy titles I’ve held (well, maybe not that fancy, but “Software Engineer…” hm…), I’m still a hacker at heart. That’s how I started: unstructured, undisciplined, whatever I can throw into it to get it to work, printf’s to debug… a hacker. My life has been a lot like that, and I might think it is no mistake that the two are so related. I’ve never structured these hours that I am waking upon the world like perhaps I should; I’ve never had the discipline in anything, really, that I’ve ever done. And so, right now I may say that I have apollonian desires, but a dionysian heart: to make something that not only is itself organized, but which is to increase the order of the world around it; and yet what I create I do so without real planning. I do not know if I will succeed, with how I go about things; but perhaps if the desire itself is strong enough, the method of achievement is little but the utensils to finish the meal. Whatever gets you through the night.

posted by John H. Doe @ 7:57 pm

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