I should stop thinking that I can see the underlying reason(s) why things happen like they do. I am invariably wrong when I so theorize. How many times have I thought that I glimpsed the outlying points of the Plan, the Truth beneath the truth, the wonder of the Wisdom? And always, it turns out that what I saw was nothing of the sort, merely all too human rationalizations of what I believe thing should be. But I suppose it is the curse of the human animal, that he tries to find the pattern to it all. And that instinct has borne much fruit, if one thinks of it — all of science rests on this ability. But I must remember that even in disciplines with empirical backing, many the pattern was seen that had no basis in what is; probably it is the case that many more turned out to be wrong than right. What I try and do, to intuit the reasons of the Infinite — how much more will I end up inside wrong conclusions? And yet this habit, if I am right one in a thousand times: that thousandth time, if it comes at all, that would be worth it, indeed. The most fractured of glimpses.
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